Musings on personal growth, books, motherhood, writing, and more.
One lesson of adulthood I’ve been learning is to have patience with awkward beginnings of new friendships. Making new acquaintances and casual friends is easy, but growing close, deep friendships (or any close relationship) takes time and effort. The beginning stage of the process often has a clunky, awkward, and even stilted feel, as my new friend and I get attuned to each other’s personalities and communication styles. But I accept that imperfection, rather than try to force our interactions to fit some prescription in my mind, because if the friend and I are truly kindred spirits, time will cause that stiltedness to fall away. The path to effortless intimacy opens up only through patient effort.
Some relationships may require more effort than others, and some may turn out to be less fruitful than I’d hoped. But I have seen my efforts rewarded wonderfully with once-new friends who are now very close, essential friends in my life, with whom I can fully be my uninhibited self. So now, when I’m in the early stages of getting to know other new friends who seem like kindred spirits, I am encouraged to persist past the awkwardness, to forgive it and let it be, because I know it’s necessary for growing a potentially great friendship.